What is for sure:
Teams in playoffs:
1) Nasty
2) Legged
3) Bush
4) King
5) Stro
Teams out of the playoffs:
1) Craig
2) Smokey (pathetic showing- I'm embarrassed)
Teams still alive:
1) dc
2) Amanti
3) Quevin
4) Memorial
5) Pat's ZZZZs
Out of the teams that are definitely in the playoffs, they ALL have a shot at a first round bye.
Like I've said before, I love that 10 out of 12 teams are fighting for playoffs on the very last week of the season. This shows parity and also 12 teams that are pretty involved in this fantasy league. You all make Daddy very proud. Well done to everyone.... except Craigger.
Let's take a look at the match-ups for this crucial week:
Gamers and Legged- Amanti needs a win and a dc loss to get in. dc holds the tiebreaker with many more points than Amanti. Legged needs a win and a loss by Nasty to get a first round bye (he also needs to score five more points than Nasty, too).
Quevin and Nasty- Nasty win= first round bye. Quevin has the most points out of the 5-7 teams, so he needs Amanti and dc to lose and then needs to stay ahead of the others in terms of points.
Pat's ZZZZZs and Crusaders- Pat's need to win and have dc, Amanti, and Quevin to lose (just because he's 80 points behind Quevin). Crusaders also need a win and a loss from dc and Amanti and then if Quevin wins, he'll need to outscore him by 28.
Bush and Pump- Bush win=First round bye. Pump win and a Coatu loss means a first round bye for Pump. Both teams are in, who, if either, is going to get the bye?
Coatu and Smokey- Coatu win and a Bush loss=First round bye.
dc and Tasha- dc win= playoffs (unless Amanti wins and outscores you by 217 points).
I love fantasy!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
11 Down, 2 To Go
Anyone else feeling depressed? In the past week, the temperature here in the wonderful green mountain state hasn't reached 40. Average temperatures have been hovering around 25. Snow is falling. Squirrels are disappearing. Life as we know it is coming to an end. I hate winter.
My hatred of winter is only enhanced with my sadness of the football season going by much too quickly. How is it possible that we're in week 12 of the regular season. The lull between the end of football and the beginning of baseball adds to my misery in so many ways.
With only two weeks left in our regular season, it's put up or shut up time for many teams. Here's the playoff picture if playoffs were to start tonight:
Coatu- Ouch. Good thing I'm not doing power rankings anymore. 57 points? I'm a firm believer in getting bad games out of your system before heading into the playoffs. If my team is scoring 120 points every week going into playoffs, I worry about laying an egg in round one. If my team falters the week before playoffs, I'm the happiest kid in the world. Is this backward thinking?
Nasty- Losing last week has put King and Nasty in danger of losing their first round bye. The only thing keeping King in the two slot is his advantage over Bush in overall points. I don't know if this is wrong or not, but I'm rooting for these two teams to falter to make the last week of the season meaningful for everyone (except us bottom feeders). I can't believe I'm this interested even with me being out of it for so long. I'll definitely be looking for some side action once we know the six teams that are in.
Bush- Kyle put himself in range of getting a first round bye by putting the ultimate beat down on Dan (78-66). Anytime I see anyone win with less than 80 points makes me wish we used power rankings. However, I've been finding myself hoping college football doesn't fold and create a playoff system. When record means everything, winning means everything. When winning means everything, excitement and disappointment is heightened EVERY WEEK. There's a certain aspect of this sense of desperation that I enjoy. To scrape by and scratch out a win is what the Titans are all about this year. Maybe the same could be said for Bush.
Pump- Last week was so critical in Mark's playoff push. Beating Nasty was a surprise and now Mark is sitting pretty. There's only one scenario now where Mark won't make playoffs (he loses two and Greg wins two... and scores more points than Mark). What's great is that these two play each other this week. This is what I love, every match up from this point forward is meaningful.
Legged- This is where the playoff picture gets a bit more interesting. Ryan also came up big last week with a win against Jon. With one win in the next two, Ryan should be able to breathe easy. If he falters this week against Nasty, he'll be biting his nails and probably won't be too nice to Baby as he'll be all stressed out the following week.
Gamers- I know I should be rooting for Amanti, but it's absolutely killing me that he has 800 points in 11 games this year and is currently in playoffs. This is making me completely reconsider my stance on not wanting power rankings next year. If we used power rankings, dc would be getting this last slot, while Amanti would be out of contention in 9th (12 points behind... which is huge in power rankings). Ok, I'm done hating. From this point forward, I'm rooting for Amanti. I feel like it's kind of rooting for Rudi. Someone who really shouldn't have a chance, but is given one and will do all he can with this chance.
Out of the picture:
Crusaders- How mad is Greg? Losing to one point to Amanti last week has put him in a very precarious position. A loss this week will all but eliminate Greg from his dream of making fantasy playoffs. It'll happen some year, buddy.
dc- Out of everyone, last week's loss really hurt Dan's chances of making playoffs. Dan is the first team that we can look at and see that not only does he need two wins, but he needs many losses from the people ranked higher. Not looking good for my adopted team to make playoffs.
Quevin and Pat's ZZZZZ's- I'm not going to waste too much time on these two. Although not dead, they should be looking ahead to next year. I would offer to do something really stupid if they made playoffs, but with my luck, it would happen. So, I will all but call them out.
Tasha and Smokey- Yeah, we suck.
My hatred of winter is only enhanced with my sadness of the football season going by much too quickly. How is it possible that we're in week 12 of the regular season. The lull between the end of football and the beginning of baseball adds to my misery in so many ways.
With only two weeks left in our regular season, it's put up or shut up time for many teams. Here's the playoff picture if playoffs were to start tonight:
Coatu- Ouch. Good thing I'm not doing power rankings anymore. 57 points? I'm a firm believer in getting bad games out of your system before heading into the playoffs. If my team is scoring 120 points every week going into playoffs, I worry about laying an egg in round one. If my team falters the week before playoffs, I'm the happiest kid in the world. Is this backward thinking?
Nasty- Losing last week has put King and Nasty in danger of losing their first round bye. The only thing keeping King in the two slot is his advantage over Bush in overall points. I don't know if this is wrong or not, but I'm rooting for these two teams to falter to make the last week of the season meaningful for everyone (except us bottom feeders). I can't believe I'm this interested even with me being out of it for so long. I'll definitely be looking for some side action once we know the six teams that are in.
Bush- Kyle put himself in range of getting a first round bye by putting the ultimate beat down on Dan (78-66). Anytime I see anyone win with less than 80 points makes me wish we used power rankings. However, I've been finding myself hoping college football doesn't fold and create a playoff system. When record means everything, winning means everything. When winning means everything, excitement and disappointment is heightened EVERY WEEK. There's a certain aspect of this sense of desperation that I enjoy. To scrape by and scratch out a win is what the Titans are all about this year. Maybe the same could be said for Bush.
Pump- Last week was so critical in Mark's playoff push. Beating Nasty was a surprise and now Mark is sitting pretty. There's only one scenario now where Mark won't make playoffs (he loses two and Greg wins two... and scores more points than Mark). What's great is that these two play each other this week. This is what I love, every match up from this point forward is meaningful.
Legged- This is where the playoff picture gets a bit more interesting. Ryan also came up big last week with a win against Jon. With one win in the next two, Ryan should be able to breathe easy. If he falters this week against Nasty, he'll be biting his nails and probably won't be too nice to Baby as he'll be all stressed out the following week.
Gamers- I know I should be rooting for Amanti, but it's absolutely killing me that he has 800 points in 11 games this year and is currently in playoffs. This is making me completely reconsider my stance on not wanting power rankings next year. If we used power rankings, dc would be getting this last slot, while Amanti would be out of contention in 9th (12 points behind... which is huge in power rankings). Ok, I'm done hating. From this point forward, I'm rooting for Amanti. I feel like it's kind of rooting for Rudi. Someone who really shouldn't have a chance, but is given one and will do all he can with this chance.
Out of the picture:
Crusaders- How mad is Greg? Losing to one point to Amanti last week has put him in a very precarious position. A loss this week will all but eliminate Greg from his dream of making fantasy playoffs. It'll happen some year, buddy.
dc- Out of everyone, last week's loss really hurt Dan's chances of making playoffs. Dan is the first team that we can look at and see that not only does he need two wins, but he needs many losses from the people ranked higher. Not looking good for my adopted team to make playoffs.
Quevin and Pat's ZZZZZ's- I'm not going to waste too much time on these two. Although not dead, they should be looking ahead to next year. I would offer to do something really stupid if they made playoffs, but with my luck, it would happen. So, I will all but call them out.
Tasha and Smokey- Yeah, we suck.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
New System
I have 27 minutes to write this post, let's see how I do:
Yes, the power rankings have been fun throughout the year, but it's time to change things up. With only three weeks left in the regular season, it's becoming apparent that some of us are clearly out of the picture, some are clearly in, while the majority are still up in the air. From this point on, I will be updating the playoff picture... using the actual criteria (not the O'Hara madness from power rankings) for teams to get a spot in the post-season.
Playoff Teams:
1st Seed-Coatu Hazel: Yes, that's right- Kinger is the top seed if playoffs were to start today. With Quevin, Pat's ZZZZZ's, and Smokey left, Kinger could hold onto the top spot until the actual playoffs start. Actually, his magical number is just one to lock up a first round bye.
2nd Seed- Big Nasty: Just like Kinger, Matt is all but guaranteed a first round bye. He'd have to lose the next three while Ryan would have to win his next three and score more points than him in that time frame. Either way, it looks at this point as if the two top seeds are secure.
3rd Seed-Bush: Without doing the math, I want to say that Kyle has locked up a slot in the playoffs, but I guess he could fall on his face and be in a potential points battle with someone. He has an easy week next week against me (I'll throw the game for you for $20), but this week he plays the self-proclaimed hottest team (dc) and then finishes the season against a strong Pump side. He'll make it, but I'm worried that he may need a rest once he gets in.
4th Seed- Pump: This is where things get a little trickier. Mark sits at 6-4. Three losses in a row puts him at 6-7 and definitely susceptible to missing the playoffs. There's too many sharks in the water now to stumble. I hope he has bandaids with him in case he gets a little cut this week against Nasty.
5th Seed- Legged- Aughh, makes me sick that he's in the playoff hunt. It's not that I don't like the kid, he just makes me feel like less of a man when he beats me in fantasy. At the moment he sits in the fifth position, even though he has the same record as Greg, but he somehow has more overall points (the tiebreaker) than him. He finishes with Nasty, Amanti, and Jon so there's definitely no guarantee that he'll be in this picture for long.
6th Seed- Crusaders- Ever see a big man balance on a high wire? That's what I'm envisioning with Greg as he's holding the last playoff slot, but only by the slimmest of margins. With two 4-5-1 teams breathing down his neck, every week is going to be a potential artery blocker. I hope the kid can find something to keep his heart rate down as he makes his final push.
Out of the Picture for Now
7th Seed- dc- One more win from dc over Legged or Crusaders will most likely get Dan into the playoffs. I'm naming him manager of the year right now. His team was dreadful at the beginning of the season (same with Nasty I guess) and he's motivated them enough to give his team a shot at the post season. Well done.
8th Seed- Gamers- Amanti needs a little massaging to get into the playoffs. Yes, he has the same record as Dan, but he has almost 200 points less. He will need three wins, plus some major points, plus a stumble from Greg, Cousin, and Dan to have a shot.
9th Seed- Pat's ZZZZZ's- I'm almost too disappointed to write about my second team. What a disappointment. I wish I could've captained this ship. I would have had them holding the championship at this point. Jon and Kevin get the bad gene award this year.
10th-12th Seed- Quevin, Smokey, Chester- I'm not going to do the math, but I believe Quevin could somehow still get a slot, but it's not happening. Too many things have to go right in order for this to even be a possibility. As far as Craig and Me, we're sucking each other off.
Yes, the power rankings have been fun throughout the year, but it's time to change things up. With only three weeks left in the regular season, it's becoming apparent that some of us are clearly out of the picture, some are clearly in, while the majority are still up in the air. From this point on, I will be updating the playoff picture... using the actual criteria (not the O'Hara madness from power rankings) for teams to get a spot in the post-season.
Playoff Teams:
1st Seed-Coatu Hazel: Yes, that's right- Kinger is the top seed if playoffs were to start today. With Quevin, Pat's ZZZZZ's, and Smokey left, Kinger could hold onto the top spot until the actual playoffs start. Actually, his magical number is just one to lock up a first round bye.
2nd Seed- Big Nasty: Just like Kinger, Matt is all but guaranteed a first round bye. He'd have to lose the next three while Ryan would have to win his next three and score more points than him in that time frame. Either way, it looks at this point as if the two top seeds are secure.
3rd Seed-Bush: Without doing the math, I want to say that Kyle has locked up a slot in the playoffs, but I guess he could fall on his face and be in a potential points battle with someone. He has an easy week next week against me (I'll throw the game for you for $20), but this week he plays the self-proclaimed hottest team (dc) and then finishes the season against a strong Pump side. He'll make it, but I'm worried that he may need a rest once he gets in.
4th Seed- Pump: This is where things get a little trickier. Mark sits at 6-4. Three losses in a row puts him at 6-7 and definitely susceptible to missing the playoffs. There's too many sharks in the water now to stumble. I hope he has bandaids with him in case he gets a little cut this week against Nasty.
5th Seed- Legged- Aughh, makes me sick that he's in the playoff hunt. It's not that I don't like the kid, he just makes me feel like less of a man when he beats me in fantasy. At the moment he sits in the fifth position, even though he has the same record as Greg, but he somehow has more overall points (the tiebreaker) than him. He finishes with Nasty, Amanti, and Jon so there's definitely no guarantee that he'll be in this picture for long.
6th Seed- Crusaders- Ever see a big man balance on a high wire? That's what I'm envisioning with Greg as he's holding the last playoff slot, but only by the slimmest of margins. With two 4-5-1 teams breathing down his neck, every week is going to be a potential artery blocker. I hope the kid can find something to keep his heart rate down as he makes his final push.
Out of the Picture for Now
7th Seed- dc- One more win from dc over Legged or Crusaders will most likely get Dan into the playoffs. I'm naming him manager of the year right now. His team was dreadful at the beginning of the season (same with Nasty I guess) and he's motivated them enough to give his team a shot at the post season. Well done.
8th Seed- Gamers- Amanti needs a little massaging to get into the playoffs. Yes, he has the same record as Dan, but he has almost 200 points less. He will need three wins, plus some major points, plus a stumble from Greg, Cousin, and Dan to have a shot.
9th Seed- Pat's ZZZZZ's- I'm almost too disappointed to write about my second team. What a disappointment. I wish I could've captained this ship. I would have had them holding the championship at this point. Jon and Kevin get the bad gene award this year.
10th-12th Seed- Quevin, Smokey, Chester- I'm not going to do the math, but I believe Quevin could somehow still get a slot, but it's not happening. Too many things have to go right in order for this to even be a possibility. As far as Craig and Me, we're sucking each other off.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Voting for Change
As you are all well aware, I’m very sad that McCain lost in his bid to become president. It’s not that I ever had anything against this great veteran, but more so his one and only decision that led to his demise- his choice in VP. How can you promise good decisions in the future with this ridiculous decision of a running mate. What a dipshit.
This leads me into the crux of this article- bad decisions. Yes, we’ve all made some bad decisions in our day (just ask Craigger about this one girl he hooked up with in a bar up here in Burlington- ugh, just threw up a little in my mouth). As has been well documented, bad decisions in fantasy lead to disappointing years and a sense of low self-worth. I’ve made some very poor decisions this year in fantasy which have lead me to disinterest in this league, but to this point have not abused my power as commissioner to rectify these bad decisions… until now.
Starting today, I’ve made some executive decisions in light of our new socialist president. First, playoffs will now consist of all 12 teams to include everyone. Also to be fair, the bottom two teams will also get a bye in the first round as the first two teams also get byes. Second, if you finish in the bottom six, you will have a first round to yourself and then the real draft will begin with all 12 teams in subsequent rounds. Lastly, again to be fair, I’m enacting “prima nocta,” or the right of league champion to sleep with any or all of our wives or girlfriends while in the reign of his championship.
These changes, although somewhat controversial, will be instituted as of 2:30 on Wednesday, November 6th. No amount of complaining will overturn any of my decisions. When you entrust power to just one man, you’ll have to fully trust that man to do what is best for the group as a whole. Like my man, Barack, I’m your man. Thanks for giving me the power to do what is right for the league. Together we will move mountains.
As far as the power rankings go:
Coatu- This was by far and away the game of the year. What happened? Nasty fell on his face. In a down week for almost everyone, King persevered and handed Nasty a crushing 30 point defeat. There’s no doubt that this is the team to beat this year, but anything can happen. I thought I had the team to beat in baseball, and got my balls beat badly by Nasty in the semis… foreshadowing again for this year in the semis for football? King, don’t worry, Nasty uses a nice, gentle stroke when he beats your balls.
Nasty- Disappointed. I was rooting for this game to live up to all of the pre-game hype. I think Nasty took his team out the night before as they all had less than average performances. I will take the blame for Portis as my suck-ass Redskins couldn’t do anything against a really good Steelers D. Is this a one week hiccup or the first sign of bad things to come. It’ll be interesting to see how Nasty finishes the last four weeks.
Bush- I said that last week was going to be a struggle for Bush… and it was. Posting 59 points in a week is only something that Craigger should be proud of. I’m keeping Bush in the three hole as Bush has his bye week this week (playing Craigger) and should regain his form. I’m not worried.
Crusaders- I also said last week that I was a big fan of Tim Hightower and he certainly didn’t disappoint. Having him in my other league, I kept track of Timmy last week. What doesn’t show up in his stats were two huge runs that were called back because of penalties. This kid is going to be good. I was tempted to put the Crusaders over Bush, but this may have to be put on hold for a week.
Stro- There’s quiet Stro and there’s anxious Stro. This week we haven’t heard from the Maestro. Why? Because Dan showed him which hole to stick it in last week. I’ll give him credit, he didn’t make any wrong coaching decisions (including keeping Addai on his bench), it was just a case of his team underperforming. I have a feeling that Stro will once again be chirping after a victory over Amanti this week.
Legged- How can someone score 69 points (hahaha 69) and get a victory? I’ll tell you how, by playing a ridiculously bad team. Cousin was probably hoping to move up this week, but I almost want to move him down for taking credit for that sorry-ass victory. The noble thing to do would be to not accept the W. Give it back to the league. You didn’t deserve it.
Ever Changing Name- I’m not sure when Jon once again changed his name, but I hope it wasn’t before Sunday. All “Jeff’s Curse” did was get him three straight victories. Although I’m not the most superstitious guy in the world, I wouldn’t ever change my name if I had a three game winning streak in place. Jon usually performs his best when he’s sitting below the sixth slot in these power rankings, so he should once again pick it up this week.
dc- Dan had an important win last week. It’ll be interesting to see if he plays Torrian this week… and how good he’ll do. Like Hightower, I’ve heard good things about Torrian. Unfortunately for Dan, he needs more help with WR than he does at RB… but too many RBs is never a bad thing.
Quevin- Many probably think that I have a personal vendetta against Kevin. I’m constantly dogging his team and making fun of his decisions (like not playing Ronnie when he went off for more points than Craiggers team). Well, some teams respond better when they’re angry and Kev’s team finally had enough of my yap. He had by far and away the best week out of everyone and he has Jamal Charles on his bench. He could end up being the starting RB for KC for this point forward. Not that this is a great thing, but he could end up being pretty good. Even with Charles, it looks as if he’s now only one WR short from being REALLY good. Unfortunately, it may be too little, too late.
Gamers- Amanti is pulling away from the field with his lowest combined point total. What’s amazing is his record. He continually gets wins and is only one win away from being in the playoffs. Sucky teams tend to do well when they’re given an opportunity (Giants last year), so we’ll have to wait to see how Amanti’s season ends up and then his possible subsequent run in the playoffs.
Smokey- My team is so bad, it’s not worth wasting more than a sentence covering.
Chester- Worse than my team (just worth a sentence fragment).
This leads me into the crux of this article- bad decisions. Yes, we’ve all made some bad decisions in our day (just ask Craigger about this one girl he hooked up with in a bar up here in Burlington- ugh, just threw up a little in my mouth). As has been well documented, bad decisions in fantasy lead to disappointing years and a sense of low self-worth. I’ve made some very poor decisions this year in fantasy which have lead me to disinterest in this league, but to this point have not abused my power as commissioner to rectify these bad decisions… until now.
Starting today, I’ve made some executive decisions in light of our new socialist president. First, playoffs will now consist of all 12 teams to include everyone. Also to be fair, the bottom two teams will also get a bye in the first round as the first two teams also get byes. Second, if you finish in the bottom six, you will have a first round to yourself and then the real draft will begin with all 12 teams in subsequent rounds. Lastly, again to be fair, I’m enacting “prima nocta,” or the right of league champion to sleep with any or all of our wives or girlfriends while in the reign of his championship.
These changes, although somewhat controversial, will be instituted as of 2:30 on Wednesday, November 6th. No amount of complaining will overturn any of my decisions. When you entrust power to just one man, you’ll have to fully trust that man to do what is best for the group as a whole. Like my man, Barack, I’m your man. Thanks for giving me the power to do what is right for the league. Together we will move mountains.
As far as the power rankings go:
Coatu- This was by far and away the game of the year. What happened? Nasty fell on his face. In a down week for almost everyone, King persevered and handed Nasty a crushing 30 point defeat. There’s no doubt that this is the team to beat this year, but anything can happen. I thought I had the team to beat in baseball, and got my balls beat badly by Nasty in the semis… foreshadowing again for this year in the semis for football? King, don’t worry, Nasty uses a nice, gentle stroke when he beats your balls.
Nasty- Disappointed. I was rooting for this game to live up to all of the pre-game hype. I think Nasty took his team out the night before as they all had less than average performances. I will take the blame for Portis as my suck-ass Redskins couldn’t do anything against a really good Steelers D. Is this a one week hiccup or the first sign of bad things to come. It’ll be interesting to see how Nasty finishes the last four weeks.
Bush- I said that last week was going to be a struggle for Bush… and it was. Posting 59 points in a week is only something that Craigger should be proud of. I’m keeping Bush in the three hole as Bush has his bye week this week (playing Craigger) and should regain his form. I’m not worried.
Crusaders- I also said last week that I was a big fan of Tim Hightower and he certainly didn’t disappoint. Having him in my other league, I kept track of Timmy last week. What doesn’t show up in his stats were two huge runs that were called back because of penalties. This kid is going to be good. I was tempted to put the Crusaders over Bush, but this may have to be put on hold for a week.
Stro- There’s quiet Stro and there’s anxious Stro. This week we haven’t heard from the Maestro. Why? Because Dan showed him which hole to stick it in last week. I’ll give him credit, he didn’t make any wrong coaching decisions (including keeping Addai on his bench), it was just a case of his team underperforming. I have a feeling that Stro will once again be chirping after a victory over Amanti this week.
Legged- How can someone score 69 points (hahaha 69) and get a victory? I’ll tell you how, by playing a ridiculously bad team. Cousin was probably hoping to move up this week, but I almost want to move him down for taking credit for that sorry-ass victory. The noble thing to do would be to not accept the W. Give it back to the league. You didn’t deserve it.
Ever Changing Name- I’m not sure when Jon once again changed his name, but I hope it wasn’t before Sunday. All “Jeff’s Curse” did was get him three straight victories. Although I’m not the most superstitious guy in the world, I wouldn’t ever change my name if I had a three game winning streak in place. Jon usually performs his best when he’s sitting below the sixth slot in these power rankings, so he should once again pick it up this week.
dc- Dan had an important win last week. It’ll be interesting to see if he plays Torrian this week… and how good he’ll do. Like Hightower, I’ve heard good things about Torrian. Unfortunately for Dan, he needs more help with WR than he does at RB… but too many RBs is never a bad thing.
Quevin- Many probably think that I have a personal vendetta against Kevin. I’m constantly dogging his team and making fun of his decisions (like not playing Ronnie when he went off for more points than Craiggers team). Well, some teams respond better when they’re angry and Kev’s team finally had enough of my yap. He had by far and away the best week out of everyone and he has Jamal Charles on his bench. He could end up being the starting RB for KC for this point forward. Not that this is a great thing, but he could end up being pretty good. Even with Charles, it looks as if he’s now only one WR short from being REALLY good. Unfortunately, it may be too little, too late.
Gamers- Amanti is pulling away from the field with his lowest combined point total. What’s amazing is his record. He continually gets wins and is only one win away from being in the playoffs. Sucky teams tend to do well when they’re given an opportunity (Giants last year), so we’ll have to wait to see how Amanti’s season ends up and then his possible subsequent run in the playoffs.
Smokey- My team is so bad, it’s not worth wasting more than a sentence covering.
Chester- Worse than my team (just worth a sentence fragment).
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Trick or Treat
It’s trick or treat time and in celebration, I figured we should look back through the draft to see who everyone’s tricks (sucky-ass players like Tommy B.) have been and who people’s treats (Matt Forte) have been. We’ll go team by team. Some teams have more tricks than treats or vice versa. Don’t get mad if you’re team sucks, it’s just the Halloween hand you were dealt this year. Suck it up! Note- Keepers aren’t part of this trick or treat edition.
In order to be in the “treats” section, you needed to score at least 60 points as a RB/WR/TE and at least 110 points if you were a QB- for the season.
To be in the “tricks” section, you needed to score 40 or less points for a RB/WR/TE or 80 or fewer if you were a QB.
There were many teams with a majority of their players in the middle zone. Most likely you would’ve put them in the “tricks” column as you probably think that they suck. More importantly, I want to point out how bad we are at drafting. Every team made some very poor decisions. Good to know going into next year.
Here are the results:
Bush (number one pick overall):
Treats- LT, Jacobs, McGahee, and D. Bowe,
Tricks- S. Holmes, K. Jones, J. Fargas, J. Hardy, H. Miller, J. Gaffney, and D. Keller
O’Hara (number two pick)
Treats- A. Johnson (just traded), D. Williams, and J. Campbell (2nd to last pick overall)
Tricks- Pretty much my whole team: Brady, S. Young, R. Mendenhall, M. Morris, J. Walker, R. Williams, D. Stallworth,
Jeff’s Curse (Jon- number three)
Treats- AP, L. Evans, M. Schaub, and Aaron Rodgers (147th pick out of 168 total picks)
Tricks- Palmer, Holt, Winslow, R. Williams, Kolby Smith
Coatu (Kinger- number four)
Treats- Westbrook, C. Johnson, S. Slaton (recently traded), P. Rivers, and S. Moss
Tricks- W. Parker, C. Perry, R. Curry, and A. Crumpler
Pump (Mark- number five)
Treats- B. Marshall, G. Jennings (Should I put Manning and MJD in the treat section?)
Tricks- N. Burleson, T. Bell, J. Galloway, B. Engram, M. Clayton, and J. Porter
Legged (Ryan- number six)
Treats- S. Jackson, M. Turner, H. Ward, and D. McNabb (Cuz has a lot of middle of the road type guys- Whitten, Edge, Chambers, etc.)
Tricks- Vinatieri, K. Curtis, and Kitna
Quevin (Kev- number seven)
Treats- M. Lynch, R. Brown, A. Boldin, L. Coles, K. Warner (138th pick overall)
Tricks- Maroney, C. Johnson, V. Davis, and L. Jordan
Nasty (Matt- number eight)
Treats- Portis (MVP), Bush, LenDale Fatty, Gates, and I guess Favre (for his one big game)
Tricks- M. Harrison, A. Green, D. McAllister, and R. Johnson
Chester (Craig- number nine)
Treats- C. Johnson, S. Morris (even though he dropped him), V. Jackson (even though he dropped him)
Tricks- TO, D. McFadden, F. Jones (for where you picked him at #40), R. Williams, R. Rice, A. Gonzalez, A. Bradshaw, B. Watson, J. Russell
dc (Dan- number 10)
Treats- J. Lewis, T. Jones, S. Smith, Matt Forte, B. Berrian
Tricks- F. Taylor, T. Gonzalez, K. Watson, M. Hasselback
Gamers (Amanti- number 11)
Treats- Houshmandzadeh, J. Jones, R. White, E. Manning?
Tricks- L. Johnson, D. Anderson, C. Taylor, P. Crayton, T. Heap, B. Jackson
Crusaders (Greg- Number 12)
Treats- R. Wayne, E. Graham, J. Stewart, J. Cutler, and T. Hightower
Tricks- J. Shockey, S. Rice, J. Norwood, Bryant Johnson, R. Meachum, LJ Smith
Now, let’s get to the much anticipated O’Hara Power Rankings:
Nasty- When you’ve been ranked number one and you continually find ways to win, how could you be bumped down to number two? I think Kinger’s team is solidifying themselves as the legitimate two seed, with a chance every week to become number one. I’m wondering if LenDale White made fun of Deuce for taking a weight loss supplement. The only bummer here is that Deuce will be suspended four games while LenDale will be just getting fatter. Both of these things aren’t good news for Coach Nasty.
Coatu- Not sure how this team was assembled. No one should have the talent Kinger has in a 12-team league. For as long as I’ve been around, I don’t think King has ever come close to smelling playoffs or any of our championships. There’s no way he doesn’t get a one or two seed in these playoffs and therefore will get a bye. Even if he gets hit with the injury bug, his bench is better than most teams. I really feel like King will have to royally screw up not to win it all this year. Can’t wait to see this all play out.
Bush- I traded for LT in my other league and I can’t tell you how much I’m hoping that he returns to his old self. Last week he showed the Brits his moves and now he has a bye week. Kyle may have an off week with LT resting this week, but I’m thinking there are good times to come when he returns.
Stro- Embarrassing Craigger will always get you to move up the power rankings faster. But embarrassing him when you have three of your top players on your bench (Marshall, Jennings, and Addai), is just wrong. Have you no sympathy in your heart, Stro? There’s definitely some potential on this team. Getting them all to show up on the same week is what is proving challenging.
Curse- Anyone notice that my team has won three in a row? Yup, ever since I initially dropped him out of the playoff picture, Jon has finally motivated his team to three straight victories. I’m guarded in saying that he has an easy match up this week against Amanti, but with Gore on a bye, I’m actually a little nervous. Hopefully the week off has given AP a much needed rest and he’ll be ready to post 45 points on Houston.
Crusaders- Nothing like having your defense score 20 points to help you pull out a 73-72 victory over the woeful Quevin team. I will admit that I made fun of Greg about his Pennington pick up and of course my doubts led Pennington to a very solid game. The interesting piece to this team to keep track of is Tim Hightower on his bench. Already being the goal line back for the Cardinals, it’s now rumored he may take over the starting duties from Edge. If this happens, Greg has a chance. If not, he’ll still be one player away from making it to the promised land.
Legged- This week’s performance from Cuz is the type of outing that I’ve been calling for all year. I’ll stick with my gut and say that this team is not very good. Now at 4-4, he is only a couple bad weeks away from being out of the playoff picture. Yes, he’s playing my Smokey Burt team this week, but this is no easy win anymore. This guy (Smokey Burt) has had two solid weeks of 96 and 97 points. Legged will have to get his old foggies motivated to beat the young guns on Burt.
dc- I’ll be the first to admit that I have no idea how Steve Smith is so good. I’ve never once drafted him in any league because I continually think that someone that small will never be successful in the rough and tough NFL. The catches this guy makes are miraculous. Even with all of his success, I still think at some point defenses are going to figure him out. Sitting at 2-5-1, every week is a must win and this week’s opponent is Pappa Pump. It’ll be interesting to see how this game plays out.
Smokey- Starting with dc and continuing down to Chester, we’re all in need of consistent wins from this week until the end of the season. We’re all staring down being eliminated from playoff contention and the rest of you can expect our best efforts from this point forward. My trade with King was viewed as good for King, bad for me. It’s up to my new crew to show that I knew what I was doing when accepting this trade. This week is the beginning of the season for me.
Gamers- Amanti knows this team is bad and is just trying to stay afloat for a few more weeks. Out of all of the bottom feeders, he actually has the best chance to make the playoffs. With a game against Jon this week, I don’t foresee a win for Amanti.
Quevin- Losing six in a row with the talent he has on this team takes effort and a certain amount of talent. He faces Bush this week who is without LT and Brees, so to break his six game losing streak may actually be possible. I haven’t run the numbers, but he and Craig are either already out of the playoff picture or will be with their next loss. What a disappointing season for a team that had so much potential.
Chester- What I love about Craig, is that no matter how bad his team is, he’ll still be looking to make moves to improve his team. Unfortunately for him, all of his work on the waivers has only led his team to a ridiculous six game losing streak. Anyone remember when Craig was 2-0… yeah, me neither. He may stop trying after a loss this week to Greg.
In order to be in the “treats” section, you needed to score at least 60 points as a RB/WR/TE and at least 110 points if you were a QB- for the season.
To be in the “tricks” section, you needed to score 40 or less points for a RB/WR/TE or 80 or fewer if you were a QB.
There were many teams with a majority of their players in the middle zone. Most likely you would’ve put them in the “tricks” column as you probably think that they suck. More importantly, I want to point out how bad we are at drafting. Every team made some very poor decisions. Good to know going into next year.
Here are the results:
Bush (number one pick overall):
Treats- LT, Jacobs, McGahee, and D. Bowe,
Tricks- S. Holmes, K. Jones, J. Fargas, J. Hardy, H. Miller, J. Gaffney, and D. Keller
O’Hara (number two pick)
Treats- A. Johnson (just traded), D. Williams, and J. Campbell (2nd to last pick overall)
Tricks- Pretty much my whole team: Brady, S. Young, R. Mendenhall, M. Morris, J. Walker, R. Williams, D. Stallworth,
Jeff’s Curse (Jon- number three)
Treats- AP, L. Evans, M. Schaub, and Aaron Rodgers (147th pick out of 168 total picks)
Tricks- Palmer, Holt, Winslow, R. Williams, Kolby Smith
Coatu (Kinger- number four)
Treats- Westbrook, C. Johnson, S. Slaton (recently traded), P. Rivers, and S. Moss
Tricks- W. Parker, C. Perry, R. Curry, and A. Crumpler
Pump (Mark- number five)
Treats- B. Marshall, G. Jennings (Should I put Manning and MJD in the treat section?)
Tricks- N. Burleson, T. Bell, J. Galloway, B. Engram, M. Clayton, and J. Porter
Legged (Ryan- number six)
Treats- S. Jackson, M. Turner, H. Ward, and D. McNabb (Cuz has a lot of middle of the road type guys- Whitten, Edge, Chambers, etc.)
Tricks- Vinatieri, K. Curtis, and Kitna
Quevin (Kev- number seven)
Treats- M. Lynch, R. Brown, A. Boldin, L. Coles, K. Warner (138th pick overall)
Tricks- Maroney, C. Johnson, V. Davis, and L. Jordan
Nasty (Matt- number eight)
Treats- Portis (MVP), Bush, LenDale Fatty, Gates, and I guess Favre (for his one big game)
Tricks- M. Harrison, A. Green, D. McAllister, and R. Johnson
Chester (Craig- number nine)
Treats- C. Johnson, S. Morris (even though he dropped him), V. Jackson (even though he dropped him)
Tricks- TO, D. McFadden, F. Jones (for where you picked him at #40), R. Williams, R. Rice, A. Gonzalez, A. Bradshaw, B. Watson, J. Russell
dc (Dan- number 10)
Treats- J. Lewis, T. Jones, S. Smith, Matt Forte, B. Berrian
Tricks- F. Taylor, T. Gonzalez, K. Watson, M. Hasselback
Gamers (Amanti- number 11)
Treats- Houshmandzadeh, J. Jones, R. White, E. Manning?
Tricks- L. Johnson, D. Anderson, C. Taylor, P. Crayton, T. Heap, B. Jackson
Crusaders (Greg- Number 12)
Treats- R. Wayne, E. Graham, J. Stewart, J. Cutler, and T. Hightower
Tricks- J. Shockey, S. Rice, J. Norwood, Bryant Johnson, R. Meachum, LJ Smith
Now, let’s get to the much anticipated O’Hara Power Rankings:
Nasty- When you’ve been ranked number one and you continually find ways to win, how could you be bumped down to number two? I think Kinger’s team is solidifying themselves as the legitimate two seed, with a chance every week to become number one. I’m wondering if LenDale White made fun of Deuce for taking a weight loss supplement. The only bummer here is that Deuce will be suspended four games while LenDale will be just getting fatter. Both of these things aren’t good news for Coach Nasty.
Coatu- Not sure how this team was assembled. No one should have the talent Kinger has in a 12-team league. For as long as I’ve been around, I don’t think King has ever come close to smelling playoffs or any of our championships. There’s no way he doesn’t get a one or two seed in these playoffs and therefore will get a bye. Even if he gets hit with the injury bug, his bench is better than most teams. I really feel like King will have to royally screw up not to win it all this year. Can’t wait to see this all play out.
Bush- I traded for LT in my other league and I can’t tell you how much I’m hoping that he returns to his old self. Last week he showed the Brits his moves and now he has a bye week. Kyle may have an off week with LT resting this week, but I’m thinking there are good times to come when he returns.
Stro- Embarrassing Craigger will always get you to move up the power rankings faster. But embarrassing him when you have three of your top players on your bench (Marshall, Jennings, and Addai), is just wrong. Have you no sympathy in your heart, Stro? There’s definitely some potential on this team. Getting them all to show up on the same week is what is proving challenging.
Curse- Anyone notice that my team has won three in a row? Yup, ever since I initially dropped him out of the playoff picture, Jon has finally motivated his team to three straight victories. I’m guarded in saying that he has an easy match up this week against Amanti, but with Gore on a bye, I’m actually a little nervous. Hopefully the week off has given AP a much needed rest and he’ll be ready to post 45 points on Houston.
Crusaders- Nothing like having your defense score 20 points to help you pull out a 73-72 victory over the woeful Quevin team. I will admit that I made fun of Greg about his Pennington pick up and of course my doubts led Pennington to a very solid game. The interesting piece to this team to keep track of is Tim Hightower on his bench. Already being the goal line back for the Cardinals, it’s now rumored he may take over the starting duties from Edge. If this happens, Greg has a chance. If not, he’ll still be one player away from making it to the promised land.
Legged- This week’s performance from Cuz is the type of outing that I’ve been calling for all year. I’ll stick with my gut and say that this team is not very good. Now at 4-4, he is only a couple bad weeks away from being out of the playoff picture. Yes, he’s playing my Smokey Burt team this week, but this is no easy win anymore. This guy (Smokey Burt) has had two solid weeks of 96 and 97 points. Legged will have to get his old foggies motivated to beat the young guns on Burt.
dc- I’ll be the first to admit that I have no idea how Steve Smith is so good. I’ve never once drafted him in any league because I continually think that someone that small will never be successful in the rough and tough NFL. The catches this guy makes are miraculous. Even with all of his success, I still think at some point defenses are going to figure him out. Sitting at 2-5-1, every week is a must win and this week’s opponent is Pappa Pump. It’ll be interesting to see how this game plays out.
Smokey- Starting with dc and continuing down to Chester, we’re all in need of consistent wins from this week until the end of the season. We’re all staring down being eliminated from playoff contention and the rest of you can expect our best efforts from this point forward. My trade with King was viewed as good for King, bad for me. It’s up to my new crew to show that I knew what I was doing when accepting this trade. This week is the beginning of the season for me.
Gamers- Amanti knows this team is bad and is just trying to stay afloat for a few more weeks. Out of all of the bottom feeders, he actually has the best chance to make the playoffs. With a game against Jon this week, I don’t foresee a win for Amanti.
Quevin- Losing six in a row with the talent he has on this team takes effort and a certain amount of talent. He faces Bush this week who is without LT and Brees, so to break his six game losing streak may actually be possible. I haven’t run the numbers, but he and Craig are either already out of the playoff picture or will be with their next loss. What a disappointing season for a team that had so much potential.
Chester- What I love about Craig, is that no matter how bad his team is, he’ll still be looking to make moves to improve his team. Unfortunately for him, all of his work on the waivers has only led his team to a ridiculous six game losing streak. Anyone remember when Craig was 2-0… yeah, me neither. He may stop trying after a loss this week to Greg.
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